He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
