You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
i out mim tonsoeep
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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