I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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