my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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