just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize