they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
