Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
She bit a glass in half.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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