i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
