It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
