i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
