thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
