I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
just found out that she named her cat after me.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
