I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize