Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
We're facebook friends in real life
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
