i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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