ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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