okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
