If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
