it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I wish life had little blips of pornography
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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