Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
