U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
