it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
