yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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