Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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