sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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