Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I need a burrito and a hug.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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