Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
