Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
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