I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
