i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
