I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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