If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
