I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
