I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
