so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
