I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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