Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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