Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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