I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
