what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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