real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
This house was built for laser tag.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
