Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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