Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
