i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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