Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
