I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
