She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
