He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
operation have a gay friend backfired
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
