remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
