What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
