Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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